where my thoughts have been.

I really havent felt like I have wanted to blog or even talk to anyone recently. A lot of things have been on my mind and therefore I feel My mind has been preoccupied.
here is a list that has been bothering me.
1. a friend that I haven't talk to in months.
2. a certain relationship I still have yet to figure out.
3. what I am going to do within the next couple of months.
4. My parents.
5. my job.

I am really not miserable at all, yes these things bother me to no end but it does not make me unhappy. God is in the middle of all of these situations. I just need to be patient and pray. I just only wish some people would make things easier on me.

rambling thoughts.

I have not written in awhile. Its funny that writing used to be my release, my way of coping. Now it is just too much to contemplate to much to sort out.
When things go wrong I tend to shut myself out from the world, go into my shell.
When something is not going well I prefer to not communicate with those who I am closest to.
things have been tough with school finishing and summer beginning. This summer by far is not something I am looking forward to. So many faces lost, so many things to consider.
last summer I was ending high school, becoming who I thought I wanted to be.
Invested into relationships I thought I would keep.

its different to see how your dreams change, how relationships change, how what you strive for is not always a constant.

I am rambling and going to stop.

ill write later when my head is clear.