where faith comes in.

"Even though I may fall flat on my face, I am realizing You Lord will be there to pick me up."

I have been praying and talking to God as well as a few great friends of mine recently.
It has been a very uncomfortable thing for the last few days. I feel the Lord is tugging at my heart and leading me a completely different way, and while I am excited about that I am not pleased.
I literally was arguing to Him and telling him that I didn't understand His plans for my life anymore. I am a very stubborn person. A lot of the times it will take me falling flat on my face before I realize that it would be so much easier to listen and obey God the first time but many of times it will almost take a whale to swallow me before I am sent on the road that God has planned for me.


I am not going to go into a large number of details because it is still something I am very much praying and thinking about. It has to do with deciding what I am meant to do with my life. I never thought I would reconsider not going to college. That has always been one of my hopes and dreams. Something I thought I was destined to do.
The more I want to avoid and pretend He is not speaking to me to louder and clearer He talks to me. I have not heard his voice this clear in a LONG time. I was telling a good friend of mine that just last night and while doing tears started to stream out of my eyes. I began to realize that this truly is of the Lord, for it was not tears of sadness but tears or anxiousness as well just surrendering.

This is a time in my life where my faith and trust really is being tested. I am really seeking prayer as well as seeking advice to those closest to me right now. This is going to be something that I feel will be a life changing event, but it will also show me A greater picture of God's plan for my life. No matter how far off it is from what I thought and very much out of my comfort zone.

The Lord reaveled to me that he is letting everything seem chaotic and out of my reach right now because he clearly told me just a few days ago "Amy, if only you would trust me and listen to my voice. I have different plans for you life." I was in complete shock.

I keep remembering Samuel thought he was hearing Eli calling out to him and repeatedly went to Eli to ask if he was calling for him.
I myself keep hearing God's voice but repeatedly doubt it is God.

"Speak, for your servant is listening." (Samuel 3:10)