relationship status.

I was always waiting on that someone

wishing they would notice me.

trying so hard to ignore those
who did but I wish they wouldn't.

I have gone through so many different

"relationships" even just friendships.

I strive for relationships, real relationships,

not just surface ones.

I do not call myself experienced, 

I have just had enough of relationships 

to determine the difference between the two.

More and more recently I have been asked, 

"oh do you have a boy friend?"

My answer remains the same. "no, no I do not." 

I get the oddest stares from the person. It used to bother me but over the years but even within this year it does not bother me as much. This morning we had a group meeting at work and even though we work with each other we do not know much about the other. One of my questions they asked was of course, was if I had a boyfriend. They all wanted to hook me up or questioned why. 

I just smiled and of course blushed. 

To be completely honest It does not phase me anymore. I am really trying to figure out my life, and where I will be next year. I have goals and dreams and I believe those come first right now. It would be great if God sent me someone who wanted to chase the same dreams and had the same goals in mind but 

I do not want to change myself completely for that person. 

I see some many girls or even guys change their whole way of life or drop everything for the other. Some times it a good thing, but sometimes they are forgetting their dreams,

putting them on hold, not reaching their full expectations. 

I want to be able to be myself with everyone I meet. I want people to see me as real, not just a friendly face. 

There are enough of those in the world.

I want to have amazing relationships, ones that I love being with that person. There are some people I am friends with but our friendship only goes so far. Where there are those people I wish I could spend more time with, who I can tell everything to. I can do anything with these people and I just enjoy the time spent with them. I love them because they are not afraid to be themselves, 

they are not afraid to let some scars show, 

or to let some blemishes come uncovered. When I tell them I want to hang out with them I mean it. Its not just something I say to them using it as a "filler word." 
 
They are just REAL.

 I talk about these people a lot, 

because I could just not imagine life without them.

To sum all of this rambling up, I am content with my life,

my relationship status and my relationships. 

I do not know where life is taking me but what I do know is that I am not going to change who I am for anyone. I do not know who will come in and out of my life this year but 

I do know it will be a great journey. 

I do know it will not be perfect and I completely except that.

thanks for reading,